Blog and influence Kristin Gjelsvik (32) has long been open to not having children voluntarily when she appeared on the red carpet during the Vixen Influencer Awards in January with a mage baby and revealed that she was still seven months on the road.
In April, he and Dennis Poppe (27) became parents for the first time when little Falk came to the world. When Dagbladet visited a small family of three at Grünerløkka in Oslo recently, they could reveal that they now imagine becoming a big family – something that is in stark contrast to the place they were looking for a partner as themselves just a few years ago.
-Think of going from not wanting children, to wanting the whole football team? He is the best we have and we love him higher than the sky. So yes, now I want more, Gjelsvik said with a laugh.
– I have decided – I should not have children, but then something happened in my head when I saw the results of the pregnancy test. When I wait for the answer, I am sure I will delete it if the test is positive. And when it was really positive, an internal conflict arose because some of me didn't want it, while some of me knew this to look after me, he said honestly.
Will have an abortion
As Gjelsvik himself pointed out, he was basically sure he would remove his fetus. He thought and thought, and immediately went to the basement.
– I sat for three consecutive hours, and my immediate thought was that "damn, now life is over". Because my main reason for not wanting to have children in the first place is freedom, simple.
– And then I don't want to share Dennis with anyone. It's a sick thing to say, but I really don't want to share and want it to be us. Being two is not "fair", as many people believe. Two pieces are often more than enough, and perfect!
The couple who live together eventually sit down to talk about extraordinary news, and think one day they will be bored with the life they live in, bored with all travel, lack of structure and lack of routine, and just tired of living without more. challenge.
– Getting children is the biggest challenge in life, and something we know we really want to care about, besides that is curiosity, right. About what we both managed to create together, how the relationship will change, how we both work in parenting roles, and at least how grandma, my mother took this here, said Gjelsvik.
– good without it
Gjelsvik said that his mother always had big dreams of becoming a grandmother, but she had accepted that she would not be like that. According to his daughter, he was very sad, and when the blogger started thinking about how crazy he was, and Poppe's parents, at least, was worth it.
– And when he came to the world there was nothing better, so I was very happy he was here and would never be there. But I really believe that life is just as good without him, so I don't want to say that children make life meaningful, and you know what it means to love before having children.
Gjelsvik said that it was precisely the comment he often received before he became a mother, precisely that someone did not know what it was like to love someone before becoming a parent.
– But I dare say that I have a full understanding of what it means to love before I have children, but to love my own children is a different kind of love than that felt by people who live together or boyfriend or mother.
As mentioned, the couple has been Falk's small parents for more than two months. On social media, they have long realized that much has been said about "mother police", something that is already bored with Gjelsvik.
– I'm always good at pushing dirt, but it's clear that in this situation you're quite vulnerable.
– And when you basically feel that you aren't stretching completely, it doesn't get better because people will poke and try to fix things that I seem wrong.
They try everything they can to get rid of negative impurities like they say, and believe that they are good at distinguishing insecurity from constructive criticism. The latter is more than welcome and something they take.
– It's nice that someone will come up with well-meaning advice, but that's how you say it. You don't have to rebuke yourself in a way that makes you feel stupid and useless. People need to be more friendly and think that there are lots of hormones in this freshly baked mother. This is quite difficult because it has to be thrown into the role of mother, you know nothing, and try your best to do what's best for your child, Gjelsvik said.
– Terrible with each other
Poppe, on the other hand, said that he escaped from living together and that he did not trust anonymous people on the internet. But he acknowledged that the criticism continued on both of them.
– But again, you don't hear anything about daddy's police, no father runs to embarrass each other. So there is something we have to learn from the fathers, they don't do it at all. It is clear that if there are disgraceful conditions, then for God's sake, but on the contrary you have nothing to do with how people educate their children, Gjelsvik said.
– Terrible women from each other, enter pop.
Over the past few weeks, these TV couples have nurtured twice and are happy to share on social media that they can hold parties, even after their sons come to the world. There are many who respond.
– I think it's good that you can take a party or beer, even if you are already a parent. A child in the family does not mean that life has ended, despite the fact that we often hear … "Wait a minute, there is no more sleep on you," "life is over," "it becomes extraordinary but herreguuud, very tiring» "Now there will be no more time to be both of you".
These comments went hard at Poppe.
– I am afraid and think life is over. Damn, I tried to cut off so many boys' trips and nights before he came, but it was far from over, he said.
They both say that depends on how someone facilitates and develops, and admits that they already have a new boss at home and that most things happen at Falk's house. But life continues.
– He can participate so much that we don't experience that life stops for that reason. I want you to focus more on the positive, and that it is possible to live relatively the same as before you had children, if this is something you want. Now we are very fortunate to have a kind and quiet boy, besides being so special that we are both at home 100%. I know that it can be very challenging for parents, for example. have colic children and those who haven't slept in two months – it's clear that it does something for you. Now we only become parents for more than 2 months, and many can be changed. But so far, living with children has been quite fun and not troublesome.
– So it's a little more focused on life that doesn't have to end, but it's actually quite good.
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