Kerry Katona opened for the first time on TV about the death of her estranged husband, George Kay, after she died of an accidental drug overdose in July.
The couple, who shared a five-year-old daughter, Dylan-Jorge, known as a DJ, separated in 2015.
Appearing at Loose Women on Wednesday, Kerry quickly became overwhelmed when she talked about the death of George, and how she and her children have been since.
Kerry explained, George had never seen his daughter for a year, a decision that made him feel "guilty" despite knowing it was "the best" for his daughter, DJ.
He explained: "Yes I feel guilty. The DJ couldn't see his father for a year, of course I did, but every time I handed it over to George, I was worried I wouldn't get it back.
"George will spit in my face and then the DJ starts to spit in my face and I know I did my best for the DJ, I will support that decision, but of course I feel guilty."
When he was questioned about his death, because he had not talked about it since, he began to cry when he admitted that this was because of his "anger" at him leaving his daughter.
George's sister had tried to make contact with Kerry before his manager called to tell him what had happened, but Kerry said he already knew what would happen before he was told.
After being confirmed, Kerry, who was still married to him at the time of his death, told the panel how he drove straight to the resting chapel to see him and did not expect to be as angry as he was.
Crying while holding back tears, Kerry explained: "I went to the chapel resting, I drove straight down because we were still married.
"I was so angry that she left her baby daughter, she was very beautiful."
From his reaction, he added: "Pure anger. Everyone kept asking me how I felt … I was very angry.
"He gave me hell when he was alive, then he left a world that I would not lie to. He was better than his place, he was very unhappy and had many demons, so many problems."
After being controlled online and accused of having "blood on his hands" for George's death, the singer refused to be blamed for his ex choosing drugs in his family, and it was this addiction that made him leave him.
He said: "I did not make him do anything. I will not be blamed for his death."
Kerry also revealed how delivering the news to her children, especially George's daughter, DJ, was the most difficult conversation she had ever had.
He values his children and partner Ryan as what has made him through the past few months, while also opening up to turning to God.
Loose Women airs on weekdays at 12:30 noon at ITV.